Alison Wonderland doesn’t ever seem to shy away from her thoughts and emotions, but instead, tackles them head-on. The realness and openness heard through her lyrics are huge reasons why her music is so powerful. It’s safe to say she’s changed her fans’ lives for the better, but it hasn’t always been easy.


Now, she’s getting more personal than ever in a new interview via VICELAND‘s The Feed. It’s a must-watch for anyone who appreciates AW’s work, for all those in the industry, and for music lovers in general.

Reigning as the top-billed female DJ, you’d think Alison Wonderland has found her happy place. The reality is, underneath the superstar DJ status, she’s is a real person who has suffered from depression like many others. She has been in lonely, dark places in her life, and this is her story.

“I was stuck in something pretty bad for a while,” she shares. “Emotional abuse is maybe another word for it. And at my lowest point, I tried to kill myself. Straight up.”

Her battle with depression and suicide might come as a shock to some, but for anyone who has paid close attention to her lyrics, she’s spoken out about these troubling times on many occasions. Her new album Awake is about waking up and realizing how to get out of those bad places — which is exactly what Alison had to do to save herself.

In the video below, she recalls what it felt like when she hit rock bottom…

“I was completely disintegrating. It was a very tough time. I wasn’t eating. I wasn’t talking to anyone. It was literally destroying me.”

She continues, “I couldn’t remember what was good about me. I couldn’t remember why anyone would even like me. I couldn’t remember why I was even here…”

It’s so heartbreaking to hear, especially because Alison’s music is so impactful, uplifting, and inspiring for fans including myself. As it turns out, the music is just as therapeutic for Alison, and ultimately is what got her out of the self-destructive rut she was in.

“Honestly, writing the album really helped me. I read the lyrics, going ok, there’s a problem here.”

She talks about a moment when she had to choose — sink or swim — and thankfully, Alison Wonderland chose to swim. Sending lots of love to AW for sharing her story. We’re so proud of your strength and grateful for your music.

This, of course, comes following the news of Avicii’s death and rumored suicide. Speaking openly and removing the stigma around mental health is one of the surest ways to help prevent suicide and direct those who need help to getting it.

If you’re thinking about suicide, are worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255) is available 24/7 across the United States.

Alison Wonderland Talks Escaping Your Lowest Point

Alison Wonderland: Escaping your lowest point

She’s one of the biggest female DJs in the world.But Alison Wonderland’s real life has been anything but a fairytale.She caught up with Patrick Abboud.

Posted by The Feed SBS VICELAND on Monday, May 7, 2018

Alison Wonderland – Happy Place

 

Photo via aLIVE Coverage for Insomniac