There’s nothing that is more telling about person than their leaked tour riders — just take Dillon Francis, Skrillex and Diplo, or Justin Bieber for example.

While we’d love to tell you that the hotel & catering requirements form below actually came straight from The White House, it’s probably just satire at its finest.

Double Stuffed Oreos, 9 lbs of bacon (traveling to the Middle East? As if), 3 plasma TVs, KFC napkins, 2016 electoral college victory maps, and an assorted box of Airhead candy are just some of the bizarre requests on this hilarious presidential suite request form. The best part is that someone took the time to make this rider look real enough to pass as an official government document.

The “leak” via the Rogue White House Senior Advisor account on Twitter can be viewed in full below: